Thursday 5 December 2013

Sarcastic Churnalism

Yeah, yeah, yeah, I still get sent stuff I'd rather not put up here... but here's a press release that I am sure is going to end up as the basis of an article in a national newspaper. Pretty sure this is offensive in some way, but I haven't quite worked out how yet. Probably gender, possibly an example of how the English aren't taking the referendum seriously...


Over to you, internet...

Inline image 1London, 5th December: Victoria Milan, the controversial online dating site for married or attached people looking for an affair, has launched a new campaign in the United Kingdom with David Cameron and Alex Salmond.

Can't help but love it when a business calls itself controversial... it's so radical and dangerous, being an on-line dating agency. I bet the establishment is shaking in its shoes, because no politician ever has had an affair.

Mobile billboards with images of David Cameron, Alex Salmond, and a British women wrapped in the Union Jack flag boasting the slogan “Relieve the passion, have an affair. Don’t burn the flag” are gracing the most famous places in London before heading to the Scottish Parliament in Edinburgh for the following month starting on 4th of December.


The campaign shows that sometimes it’s better not to break up a genuine relationship, such as the one between Scotland and the United Kingdom (or between men and women), but rather to have an affair.

“Alex Salmond and his fight for Scotland to leave the United Kingdom is a perfect example of a relationship crisis that could use an affair” says Sigurd Vedal, CEO and founder of Victoria Milan. “We know from the "thank-you" letters of our 3 million members that an affair can bring passion back into their lives, helping them to revive their marriages and long relationships” he adds. 

I'll just take a moment to ponder what on earth Sigurd is talking about. Is he suggesting that Alex Salmond is sexually frustrated? Or that the entire Scottish nation just needs a quick bunk up with France? 

Right, and letters from members does not constitute proof of anything... why the hell did some Christians spend so long worrying about gay marriage when Victoria Milan is a far greater threat to traditional values.

I would spend some time mocking the company's name, but I can't be bothered. I bet it's the name of a porn star, too. Anyway, this review, which was probably put up by a rival site, says it's rubbish anyway.

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